The Lost Soul: When You're Looking for Direction
Sometimes I feel lost.
In those moments, I have often asked, “what does Spirit want from me, and what do I want for myself?”
Such an dualistic inquiry often sends me into a tailspin of searching, reaching and trying to figure out what Spirit wants from me, even as I try to figure out what I want for myself. It’s exhausting and leads to feelings of loneliness, feeling lost, isolated and dispirited.
In a recent conversation with my friend, Fernand Poulin, we were exploring our desires. I asked him if he ever asked himself what he wants in/for his life and also what Spirit wants from him. His response was illuminating. He said he asked himself “What does God want FOR me, and am I making decisions that are in alignment with that?”*
In an instant my “efforting” and exhaustion was gone. When I asked, “What does Spirit want for me?” the response was immediate, simple, clear and elegant. The answer, “Love is your foundation.”
What I understand that to mean is that LOVE, not as an emotion, but as the uncompromising, strong, energetic resonance of life itself, is the foundation upon which to live my life. My personal quest then is to align my vision, thoughts, actions and prayers with the resonance of Love. This is where I can put my focus, effort and energy.
So, Spirit wants me to base my life on LOVE? Love is my foundation, my rock, my core, my basic resonance? I’m down with that!
Oops. I forgot about the alignment part. Easier said than done.
On a daily basis, I’m challenged with living in alignment with the resonance of Love, to embody it and to walk my talk. The cat scratches, the dog bites, the car tires need replacing, the body aches, the rain is pouring, the bills are coming in…and on and on and on. And these are just some of mundane aspects of living. What’s going to happen when I’m really challenged?
To help myself, I turn to the three basic principles we adhere to in the programs we teach at WhiteWinds/FeatherStone Institute.
1. Presence is primary.
2. Compassion completes healing.
3. Love is the medicine.
While I teach these principles, sometimes I need a reminder to apply them to my own life, and it helps to know that the greatest power in the universe wants this for me.
So if you want to find your way through life and to live with Love as Your Foundation, here are a few suggestions:
1. Presence is primary: Your presence, your engagement with life is not only needed, it’s necessary. This is what showing up is all about. These means you don’t put your life on hold, you stop waiting for someone or something to show up and make it better. The quality of your presence also matters. Most human beings, like plants and animals, tend to grow well when tended to with love, compassion and regular nurturing (meaning exercise, good food, clean water, connection with others and creative expression). How are you tending your life?
2. Compassion completes healing: Compassion is built from empathy – not sympathy. It means we deeply understand what another is feeling without pitying or feeling sorry for them. Compassion, however, is incomplete unless we also apply it to our own lives. Too often we are kind and caring towards others but we forget that we are deserving of our own compassion. Despite the missteps we may take in life, it's important to treat ourselves kindly. Yes, accountability is crucial to learning and moving on, and you may need to make amends for your actions, but let’s lay down the whip, learn from our mistakes and move forward.
3. Love is the medicine: LOVE, as the core energetic resonance of life, is not the same as emotional love. For me, that core vibration is the ultimate “Truth in Action,” the essence of God. While it has no personal agenda, LOVE always reflects back to us where we are, or are not, in alignment with our highest calling. If you’re not in alignment with your highest calling, become curious, allow yourself to see what is stopping the flow of LOVE in your life. If needed, get some help in the form of feedback from an honest friend or coach. An honest friend is worth their weight in gold!
*Side Note: For some of us, the question of “What does Spirit/God want for me?” can be fraught with peril. It all depends on your perspective of Spirit/God.
Depending on your culture, religion, family and life history your perception of Spirit/God may be tinged with paradigms that are more fearful and punishing than loving and kind.
As the granddaughter of a Baptist minister, despite the kindness of the man behind the words, I heard a lot of fire and brimstone in his sermons. Luckily for me, my mother left behind her harsh and guilt-ridden perspective of religion, and with my father’s help encouraged her children to explore and experience a variety of faiths and traditions. This left me with a rich heritage and appreciation for the common ground I see in most religions and spiritual paths.
Depending on your cultural and religious upbringing, you may hold in your mind an image of an angry God, a remote Spirit that is more vengeful than compassionate. If this is your experience, I encourage you to seek out a more balanced view of what life and Spirit has to offer. In my experience there are many paths that lead to Love. Which will you choose?